Boys Won’t Be Boys & the softer side of masculinity – Eero Nurmi ruminates on the Oulu shows

syys 26, 2024 | Masculinities, News

Our Communications & Programme Assistant Eero Nurmi had the pleasure of lending a hand with the Boys Won’t Be Boys performances at Oulun teatteri in September 2024. Discover what witnessing the socially-oriented Dutch theatre production stirred up in him – and seize the chance to support similarly significant projects by applying for the Finnish National Agency for Education (EDUFI) internship!

”For me, masculinity carries a lot of weight – our relationship has been nothing short of complicated. Even upon returning to Brussels after the Oulu excursion I flinched at the sound of low, rumbling voices repeating a rallying call I assumed to be a football chant from a visiting team. Masculine energy, especially coming from straight men, has been severely lacking in positive associations for me.

During my studies, I have read about hegemonic masculinity, i.e. the dominant form of masculinity that can change over time but largely involves stereotypical male-coded behaviours, far removed from the realm of femininity. Yet, a hegemonic form of masculinity suggests a plurality of masculinities. Not surprisingly, I have felt drawn to concepts such as New Alternative Masculinities that suggest more positive, considerate ways of being a man. (As a cherry on top, the abbreviation NAM feels endearing for a Finnish speaker.)

But have I encountered a multitude of alternative masculinities in real life, aside from my nearest and dearest? Sadly, no…

Enter stage left: Boys Won’t Be Boys at Oulun teatteri.

Boys Won't Be Boys at Oulun teatteri featuring Jani Toivola. Photo by Janne-Pekka Manninen

Boys Won’t Be Boys at Oulun teatteri featuring Jani Toivola. Photo by Janne-Pekka Manninen.

Seeing the cast of Boys Won’t Be Boys bare their souls on stage shifted something in me and there was no shortage of tears. Yet, what solidified the project’s meaning, impact and possibilities for positive change occurred backstage. Before and after the performances I paid attention to the acts of caring shared by the performers, as guided by the show’s initiator, creative director and host Rikkert van Huisstede. Check-in circles allowed everyone to voice their thoughts, calm their nerves and share words of encouragement.

The show’s impact also radiated outwards, beyond the crowds gathered to share something intimate in a dim theatre space. Rikkert and artist Jani Toivola attended an interview at Radio Kaleva during which the host, Sami Sankilampi also shared his own experiences regarding masculinity. In his youth, non-normative traits such as his punk dress style and jewellery choices were policed by fellow men.

This only goes to show that no one really fits within the confines of the ”man” box.

From my point of view, what took place on and off stage translates to a gentle union of softness and strength. Being brave enough to show softness and sensitivity allows for strength. The strength to critically assess how you take up space in the world and how opportunities could be more fairly distributed. The strength to start uncomfortable conversations at the family dinner table, during a coffee break at work or with friends on a walk in the park. After all, small streams make big rivers.

As cast member Jamie MacDonald brought up in his segment of the show, masculinity can also be a positive thing. While I may not share the same appreciation of the smell of a men’s locker room, I have begun to find reasons to agree with Jamie, with a little nudge from the entire Boys Won’t Be Boys team. When men feel free to be the kind of men they want to be, endless potential ensues.

The performances also highlighted what part culture and creative expression have to play in loosening tight mental knots and unlearning toxic behaviours. I am curious to see how the effects of the Boys Won’t Be Boys shows trickle down in the Finnish cultural context. If I could bottle the sense of freedom and hope I felt during the Oulu shows and ship it to every part of Finland and beyond, I would.”

 

Boys Won’t Be Boys’ performances in Finland were commissioned and produced by the Finnish Cultural Institute for the Benelux, produced together with Svenska Teatern and Oulun teatteri. The production was in collaboration with Jäbät & Tunteet and was generously supported by Svenska kulturfonden, Konstsamfundet, Otto A. Malmin lahjoitusrahasto, the Netherlands Embassy in Finland and Oulun Valistustalorahasto.

In Oulu, the cast included Rikkert van Huisstede, Jani Toivola, Jamie MacDonald, Julian Bohn, Julian Owusu, Daniel Woodward and Valtteri Aaltonen. The technician from Boys Won’t Be Boys was Jay van Herk.

 

EDUFI Call for Applications

The Finnish Cultural Institute for the Benelux is looking for a new Finnish National Agency for Education (EDUFI) intern for a 5-month internship! The internship starts in January 2025.

The intern will be involved in a wide range of the Institute’s activities and will gain a broad insight into what it is like to work as a Finnish cultural professional in the Benelux region. The work will mainly focus on supporting the Institute’s communication tasks as well as some general office work.

The EDUFI internship application round is open 26.9.–10.10.2024. Read more about the application criteria and submit your application. The call for applications is in Finnish.

The Institute promotes equality in its operations. We encourage applicants of different ages, representatives of different genders and people belonging to diverse language, culture and other groups. Please feel free to express this in your application if you wish. All information will be treated confidentially.

The EDUFI Internship is a granted internship programme coordinated and funded by the Finnish National Agency for Education.

 

Photos by Janne-Pekka Manninen.

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